Tiger Tiger ...

www.tigerproductions.info

2010-07-22T13:18:00.000-07:00

have been working on this site to promote my web-design and photography www.tigerproductions.info take a look

signatureguitars.net

2010-03-12T12:12:00.000-08:00

Recently got involved in designing a website, which is proving to be an interesting challenge. Please check it out signatureguitars.net it is still under development.

A Blessed Tapestry

2010-01-09T00:42:00.000-08:00

I have given my blog a bit of a spring clean. Having a look at the renovated page, particularly the column of random flickr photos from the last couple of years, reminds me of how much has happened. It is all to easy to focus on any given days troubles or tomorrow's worries and forget about all that you have, where you've come from and where you are going. I want to say thankyou to God for all the things He has given me and the ways that He has blessed me through Jesus. Particularly with the recent additions of a wife and a daughter to my life. Life in India is like a blessed tapestry that grows with new and colourful additions each time you look at it.

Untrendy Blogging

2010-01-08T05:01:00.000-08:00

Well Blogging doesn't seem to be de rigeur any more.. doesn't have the word tweet in it. I happened to stumble over my old blog today - it is looking rather neglected, and I have not posted to it for a while. Still in the City of Joy and considering starting to work again with young people. I wonder if I should restart my ruminations and ramblings that largely come from being in a foreign city on a foreign continent.

Bundle of fun - lost.

2009-07-20T01:13:00.000-07:00

Well after about a year away - I am now back in this big 'bad' city. I am happy to be back but also feeling sad having caught up with the lives of some of those I met while I was here.

Yesterday I discovered some new statistics.

One bundle of fun run over.
Another Innocent literally lost (and not found) in the station by his opium using Mum.

What a desperate situation.

smile.jpg

2008-06-28T06:22:00.001-07:00

smile.jpg
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

streetfoal

2008-06-21T01:05:00.001-07:00

streetfoal1.jpg
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

nothing is outside of ..

2008-05-01T06:58:00.000-07:00

I have been done some serious grappling with the concept of whether or not God is in control. If he is, in light of the things that I have seen over the last few months what does that say about His character... ie is He good?

I stumbled across a scripture in the NET version of the bible, which I had managed to download onto my phone. Anyway it struck me like a slap.

..he left nothing outside of his control. At present we do not yet see all things under his control.. (a bit of heb 2 v 8)

The NIV that I normally read has "subject to him" instead of control so I probably would have missed it. I realised that this scripture was answering my philosophical questioning.

If God is all powerful and in control of everything then why all the carnage? This Scipture confirms to me that while not everything is under his control there is nothing that is outside of his control.

The text is immediately followed with a but and it is an important one, see heb 2 v 9for some context (online http://www.bible.org/netbible/index.htm)

munch

2008-04-28T12:20:00.001-07:00

munch
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

estyle

2008-04-11T12:12:00.001-07:00

estyle
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

The title is a reference to a popular "English" word that is used here.

ssshh!

2008-04-11T12:08:00.001-07:00

ssshh!
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

sleepy?

2008-03-30T08:38:00.001-07:00

sleepy?
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

A classic from Bangkok

Five went to market

2008-03-28T12:35:00.001-07:00

Five went to market
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Crowned

2008-02-28T10:58:00.001-08:00

Crowned
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Blog, chicken and fries.

2008-02-28T07:23:00.000-08:00

Well I am sitting in Kfc, still in a mysterious Asian city in-case you were wondering and blogging with the help of a new toy. I have been neglecting tiger tiger.. of late. I am not planning on bearing my heart and soul over the next few months like the last six but will continue to post photos from time to time. h

Traffic

2008-02-17T10:43:00.001-08:00

Traffic
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Another image from my trip. The upper red line was produced by the tail light of a coach as it went by.

Tropical

2008-02-11T05:55:00.001-08:00

Tropical
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Still thinking about the beach..

Bucket

2008-02-10T07:42:00.001-08:00

I managed to absent mindedly leave my credit card in a shop today.. oops, if it turns out that I have lost it or it has been stolen, contrary to my current theory to its whereabouts - it could be a serious inconvenience.. oh well - I will have to tie something to my wallet to remind me not to leave anywhere without my card again. Well my excuse is that I was being dippy due to my current upset stomach, at least that is what I am going to allow myself to believe.

I have recently had some practice at empathic identification with those people who rely on a public water source - like those hundreds of thousands who live in the slums in this city - except that I have not had to wash in the street like those thousands have to. Cold water from a bucket can be quite a shock to the system, even if it is good for the constitution. I would prefer to have a hot shower in the morning, but I am sure the rest of this city would too!

I'm a monk

2008-02-07T07:27:00.001-08:00

I'm a monk
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

here is a bit of a cliché image from my recent trip

Miss the beach?

2008-02-03T09:18:00.001-08:00

I thought I was superspiritual and would be happy to be back working with smelly dirty street urchins. Well I am, but I have been pineing for the beach. I am obviously not as much of a super Christian as i thought. I had managed to decieve myself for a while but now the truth is out.

Just when my mind was beginning to wander a little too much to the beach I got a message from a friend

It was 'Whoever serves me must follow me. Where ever I am my servant will be also...'

I take this to mean God has led me here and he is here with me.

So next time my mind wanders to the beach.. John 12v26 it will be.

break

2008-01-19T06:54:00.000-08:00

h is at the beach having a rest and will be back blogging end of Jan.

'What to do?'

2008-01-07T09:52:00.001-08:00

Someone’s prayer's were answered today.

Out of the blue three girls showed up for lunch and then came to the 'school'.

The timing was uncanny

They were a fun bunch: pretty cheeky though. Sometimes it is difficult to tell the girls from the boys. In this city the younger girls, particularly the poor ones, often have very short hair. It also helps combat hair lice.

I don't know why I feel uncomfortable using the word poor. It is as though that puts them in a particular class, or dare I even say 'caste'.

The reality is the younger kids that came today were dirty and had tatty clothes, they are almost totally uneducated, often malnourished and generally barefoot - poor. Not in spirit, nor in their zeal for life, nor in their capacity to learn and relate: but in their lack of a safe environment to grow up in. Jesus said that we would always have the poor with us.

'What to do?'

Quiet

2008-01-06T05:04:00.000-08:00

I have just seen The Golden Compass, which surprisingly I quite enjoyed. Daniel Craig wasn't half as bad as I expected. However the idea of everyone's soul living externally in an accompanying animal called a demon, didn't appeal to me (an understatement!) I thought the idea of the compass being the guide to truth and the ‘dust’ revealing a matrixy reality interesting though. Any way it is not fashionable these days to think there is such thing as Truth or even truth.

I know the tone of this post is very different from the last. I am not in the place to be able to ‘hold’ the contents of the last post every minute.

I was walking back from the cinema and I realised that I had one more week and then a two week holiday, Praise the Lord. Anyway I think tigertigerbb will be a little quiet for the rest of January.

Where are the girls?

2008-01-03T08:28:00.001-08:00

I have had two days of finding out things that I would rather not know.

Yesterday I realised that many of the girls who are born in the station are sold into prostitution by their families to live away from the station in the red light part of the city. I had been wondering why we only seemed to have boys.

Today I discovered that girls aged 10 and younger are forced by their families to have sex with men in the station.

Why on earth? I think it would be naive to say I know why, but one of the main reasons is the grinding poverty and hopeless fuelled by heroin addiction.

Today I saw multiple groups of young men -'chasing' (the dragon) - smoking brown sugar from a foil.

Today I discovered that many of the boys who we work with are children born out of prostitution.

Where does it end - how can it be. Where is God in this? - Ok so He sent me ... but what can I do?

by the Grace of God I can...?

Where is the Goodness?

2007-12-28T07:13:00.000-08:00

The thin red line. A pretty moving film - saw it the other day.

One of the main themes of the films is this problem; how can a higher being whoes essence is goodness, be, as the characters are sucked into a whirlpool of death - even to the point of being in hell on earth?

This is brought out especially through the character, Private Witt, played by Jim Caviezel, who is a sensitive daydreaming man, who keeps on going A.W.O.L. He starts off in a paradise, admiring the simple life of the 'primitive' islanders, their innocence, community and closeness to nature. He sees this goodness as evidence for a higher being.

Witt holds on to the conviction that this higher being is still present, even when he is involved in the carnage at Guadalcanal.

Where is the Goodness? Why is there any hope for humanity?

Where I live there is a statue of a man dieing, or maybe he is dead, I can't tell. Is He The Goodness? Where is He now?

5 Ragamuffins

2007-12-27T06:55:00.001-08:00

Today had a handful of ragamuffins at the station. They have been coming for the last couple of weeks. A group of 5, 4 of them no older than five. They are a bundle of laughs and quite entertaining in the 'Hotel' where they get fed. One of the kids, gave me a lovely smile showing his row of rotten milk teeth. Last week I found them gathered around a small fire, heating up some mud in a pot. Amazing their ability to play even when there is only just dirt.

12 Months

2007-12-19T09:05:00.001-08:00

Well having got the go ahead for another 6 months here - I went and extended my return ticket from Jan to July. I will have to leave the country and apply for a new visa. It will give me a chance as well to find a beach, do some snorkeling and have a break from this sprawling metropolis.

In know this may not be culturally sensitive but anyway its noisy here, often very smelly, very dirty, and oh so full of people, most tend to look at anything out of the ordinary especially any 'foreigners.' Today has been a hard one. The latest challenge is people lining you up on the pavement, (not looking, or not caring) resulting in multiple shoulder clipping.

There seems to be a totally different view on personal space. I thought that I was prepared for this but nevertheless it is still surprising when total strangers start putting their hands on you or even as happened on a couple of occasions (accidentally or on purpose I don't know) manage to bump you in the groin in a crowd!

So after that minor rant you can see that I am ready for a break!

The volunteering that I have been doing is very rewarding, and I am looking forward to coming back, it's just that being here is not easy.

White Horse wandering

2007-12-16T04:57:00.000-08:00

Spied
A white horse walking nonchalantly along the pavement.
A few parrots flying down the street.
Random street kids singing 'Telephone to Jesus' to me.
Men catching fish in a park lake with sticks and bread, amongst people washing clothes and dishes, random rubbish, unmentionables, stray puppies, street children, and...
a snake patrolling deeper water.

Here the sun was warm and low, reflecting off the water.
Amazing the beauty amongst the dereliction.

Marmite and Songbirds

2007-12-08T00:23:00.000-08:00

Am starting to get back to some semblance of normal life, showed up at work a couple of days last week, except that I am not feeling totally with it yet. Still not able to do much with out feeling tired. I am also feeling a bit dis-orientated. I am now into my last full month with 'da organisation, and am having a good think about what I am going to do when January arrives, So please pray for me.

The weather is great at the moment. Am wandering around, on my day off, in shorts and t-shirt. Shorts are not really culturally sensitive, but I can't help myself. Sometimes I feel a bit homesick for the UK, however December weather is definitely not one of the things I miss. A friend bought me out some marmite, so now all I need is for you all to come and visit me! And if you could bring some rolling hills and a few British songbirds...

Out of bed

2007-12-04T08:17:00.000-08:00

Had a nasty dose of some virus or other. Your continued prayers are appreciated as I continue to regain my strength. Rspct H

Sick bed

2007-11-28T10:21:00.000-08:00

I have spent the last couple of days in bed with some lurgy or other. Not sure what it is - probably flu but you don't normally get a dodgy stomach with that do you? I am hoping that it is not some mosquito born fever (neither malaria nor dengue) that some of my friends have been blighted with.

I have been checking my emails on my mobile phone which is very convenient but I have not yet worked out how to post to my blog with the handset - hence the rather lame posting of late.

Any way sorry to those who have been faithfully checking to see if I have been writing anything.

Please pray for me that I will recover soon...

Loves control.

2007-11-21T21:54:00.000-08:00

Does Love control?
Will Love sometimes take control?

There will be a day when everything is under Love's control.

More on 'Is God in Control?'

2007-11-18T04:14:00.000-08:00

If God is in control then why do I see 6 year old children, hair matted, tied to railings? If God is in control, why do I see 14 year young people addicted to heroin with a life expectancy of a couple of months.

If I have a commitment to the reality that God is fundamentally love, that He is kind and powerful, how can I say that He is in control?

If God is in control, if he cares; about the six year old, or the fourteen year old, why doesn't he do something about it?

Well my conclusion is that, amazing as it is, (although He may not be in control in the way that I expect or want) He does care and he is doing something about it.

He calls people by the power of the Spirit of His Son to do something about it.

To make a difference, for the hundreds of thousands of young girls who are trafficked into prostitution, thousands of them in this city. Or for the children, some of them fending for themselves as young as 5, or for the drug addicts, many of whom are literally rotting to death.

Hurricane warning.

2007-11-15T06:33:00.000-08:00

"H' just to let you know there is a category 4 hurricane heading this way and we are getting evacuated, make sure you are sleeping on high ground." A friend said to me last night on the phone.

I spent the day wondering about the ferrocious meterological beast that had been unleashed.

Needless to say it has been a bit blustery today; many of the locals are wearing fleeces and hats and looking cold. To me it is an average west coast scottish summer day - except that here I am comfortable in a T-shirt.

However the warning has been noted- I will be closing the shutters, wearing my earplugs and praying I don't get wet. Shouldn't be a problem for me, I am on the first floor. For many though, who live in slum houses or on the pavement, the storm poses a much greater threat.

Machine Miracles

2007-11-15T06:16:00.000-08:00

Well after much heartache .. sounds pathetic.. particularly when you hear what I am going to say next.. my mac is no longer in a coma and is actually working.

Most folks who know me know that it is almost, but not quite, physically attached to me... but now, through the drama of 3 power supplies, 2 Dc inboards and 2 logic boards it has been relegated to 'machine of certain usefullness'. I am no longer a mac evangelist.

Off on one

2007-11-11T07:44:00.001-08:00

Have been going off on one - unfortunately for the ears of the friends that were kind enough to listen. Seems to be with the usual 'modern mindset' (which is really an ancient Greek mindset (philosophers please excuse the generalizations)).

Statements that set me off are God is in control of everything. He knows everything that is going to happen. And thinking along the lines of - life is just about finding the plan God has for you.

Now let me clarify fundamentally (oops the f word) I believe that God cares about everything that happens but I do not believe he is in control of everything. - I have tried to explain this fully but I get myself in theological knots. All I can say to explain myself is that sin is explicitly against God's will, so if anyone sins by definition God is not in control of that person. So anyone can choose to be in control(by the Holy Spirit) or out of control of God. So therefore God is not in control of everything. Jesus was fully in control of himself and I believe that his crucifixion was in the control of God the Father. But do I believe that God is in control of the children living on the street? I suppose it depends on how you define control.

God wants to bring control I believe that God's control does not look like when we take control. His control comes in humility through weakness, i.e. Jesus dieing on the cross - He then showed His power raising Him from the dead.

I am going to add a disclaimer - I am about to have to leave the internet cafe - it's closing and unfortunately am having to rush this. I am also conscious that these thoughts have probably got some gaping holes in their orthodoxy not to mention their grammar and spelling so if I have written some heresy - gentle correction will be considered.

November, December and

2007-11-10T06:58:00.000-08:00

Oh sometimes I wish life had no uncertainty - and then when I really think about it I think I prefer it with uncertainty. I know God is in control, it is just that sometimes I wish He would let me in on a bit more of what He is up to.

Suffice to say that I had a meeting the other day with 'the organisation' to discuss my progress and the outlook for the second half of my commitment here. I however am non- the-wiser as to what I will be doing from January, when I have to leave the country.

As I write this I am thinking maybe I should just stop thinking about it and get on with the job in hand.

I just don't like the uncertainty.

Light

2007-11-08T08:33:00.000-08:00

Tommorrow is the festival of lights. I need to remind myself who is the Light of the World (not a cue for Tim Hughes). People follow light - I realise that sometimes I have been following the light of Steve Jobs - but his light has recently gone out (along with my logic board, power supply and 2 dc mac inboards) - interestingly enough the downward crash of my techno-idol has caused me to focus my attention back on the Light of the World.

Who is your light?

Sight - seeing

2007-11-03T04:30:00.000-07:00

A lot has gone on in the last few days and it feels like it has been ages since I last blogged.

Here are some sights I have witnessed in the last few days.

A girl aged six or so hair matted, standing, tied by the ankle by some nylon cord to a railing. She’s one of the kids that lives on the pavement. She is tied up to stop her running in to the road. She suffers from mental damage.

Early one morning a rat and a crow having a squabble over breakfast.

A six year old boy in the station ferociously guarding a box of dried gooseberries and a packet of sanitary towels.

The site of another rat, high tailing it past my feet, inside an up-market coffee shop. He had come along the air-conditioning duct and then through a well-chewed hole in a louver door.

The amazing sound of a large group of locals praising God coming to my room from a conference.

The friendly smile of a rickshaw wallah.

What is the age of the youngest street child?

2007-10-25T10:47:00.000-07:00

Newborn.

Many children are born on the street. Here whole families live on the street. I often see very young children (under 1) asleep on the pavement, not always with a parent in view.

In the Station
You could draw a distinction between those that have been born in the station, and those that have been left alone or made their own way from another station.

For those born in the station, as they grow up they become increasingly independent and may be fending for themselves aged 4 or so, especially when their parents are heroin addicts. They will probably have the support of other children in 'loose' gangs. I often see children 3,4,5 on their own, but it is likely that there is a family member around somewhere.

Children aged 7,8,9 or so may have come from another city on the train. As they live in the station they are pretty mobile and may from time to time try their chances elsewhere.

One lad aged 8 or so, who I spoke to last month, had just arrived from another state, over 12 hours journey away, where he had been for around 4 years cleaning railway carriages. He had no recollection of any connection with family members.

Question

2007-10-25T04:29:00.000-07:00

I have just read the blog and looked at the photos. How do you cope with seeing all these beautiful children and young lads living in this way? Great to hear of all the projects etc but they should be someone’s pride and joy not the recipients of charity. Guess they are the pride and joy of our Heavenly Father and that’s why he calls folk like you over there.

Half way

2007-10-24T10:10:00.000-07:00

It has been a very educational 3 months. In case you haven’t had a chance to follow my progress here is a quick summary. Since my arrival in August I have been staying in a hostel in the centre of the city. It is fairly Spartan but does the job. I have got used to sleeping under a mosquito net and often use earplugs to guard against the noisy nights. I have had the privilege of getting to know some of the children that live on the street outside the hostel, some of whom go to a pavement club run by the organization that I work with. I am really enjoying my work with the children and young people who live rough in the station. They are poor in material possessions but still have a zest for life, even though many of their parents, if still present, are heroin addicts. I am also helping with an adult literacy group, the main challenge here is the teenage boys speak a different language to the boys at the station! We play football a lot as well as English conversation and other activities. The language continues to be a source of frustration. I had my first language lesson the other week having realised I couldn't manage on my own with out some help. The teacher said afterward to a friend that he was impressed with my ability to read the script - which was encouraging. I now know at least two thirds of the characters, not including the dreaded conjuncts - which are characters fused together to form some scary looking squiggles, but I long to be able to understand more of the conversations that carry on around me.

The kids are great, the work is a fairly natural progression from the children's and youth work I did in Europe all though now it is of a more 'detached' nature which I like. I am really impressed by the output of the organisation I work with, they seem to use their resources very effectively to reach a large number of people through a multitude of different projects. Many of the projects are recognised nationally.

I am praying for God's direction as what to do in January. I would like to stay for another 6 months but that would need to be negotiated. I would also appreciate prayer that I would continue to feel more settled and would also be able to feel at home even when most passers-by look at me as though I was an alien. Technically I am, all though I stepped off an Airbus rather than a UFO!

So please pray that God would continue to give me wisdom and vision for today and tomorrow and more importantly love for those around me. Thank you

A new reality...

2007-10-20T10:30:00.000-07:00

I have bitten the bullet and ordered a refurbished logic board from the UK. It was half the price of the one that mac quoted me here: the chancers. The up-shot of the whole saga is (assuming the new one works) I am all the more grateful for the machine that I have.

I had a nasty shock yesterday: I was walking along, when I heard a faint cry I looked down and saw this wretched looking bundle on the pavement. It was a child who had helped me with my shopping last week, a boy that I know from last year. He had called out for me as I was passing. A ‘neighbor’ told me had been hit by a bus and broken his arm and leg. (I realised later that he had broken his one 'good' arm.)

Prior to the accident he was physically handicapped and suffering from some measure of learning difficulties. I was shocked. The boy was normally a happy bouncy, although slightly simple child looked like he was nearing death's door. I talked to him and prayed for him, and thought Oh no, what am I going to do? I went to call a friend to ask him what He thought. When I came back after not being able to get through, the boy had moved and was sitting up. I realised that he was not as bad as I had thought at first. I had a dilemma, what should I do? I knew he was injured this was no charade: He had the scrapes to go with the plaster.

I saw myself as having to choose between being the Levite or the Samaritan. In the end I decided that it was not my responsibility (the Levite ) and left it to the parents. Given that the mother had just given me his medical report, this was no easy decision, even if she was trying to manipulate me.

When I went back home, I thought I am in a life changing moment... a new reality

the thing is, I am not sure quite what it is

Comatose Mac...roadkill...lynching.

2007-10-17T07:53:00.000-07:00

Well it was confirmed to me that my highly expensive laptop is out of action. At least until I can replace the logic board, which frustratingly is about the same cost as buying a replacement machine on ebay. Oh the joys of the electronic age.

I am still struggling with culture shock. I have spent way too long the last couple of days in internet cafes on facebook, ebay and generally living in a western bubble. Every day I see something new. Rather distressingly: I had seen two fat stray cheerfull puppies playing in the street, when i came back the same way one of them had been run over by a motor bike and was not going to make it. I also saw two guys trying to lynch some guy for pickpocketing. Some times I'll intervene in situations like that. People don't really know what to do when a westerner gets involved. The only thing is that one of these days it will probably backfire. There is a proverb in the old testament that cautions against getting involved in others arguments. The problem is I see so many things that I don't like - and think of as wrong. I need to be wise though .. I am a stranger in a different culture. Not some Imperial Lord. I need to be Christlike.

But what would he do? Would he get involved when he sees two young guys kicking an old man they accuse of theft... or walk away.

Surprises

2007-10-14T03:56:00.000-07:00

Had a great spontaneous street photography time with this taxi driver and his friend, who like most of the locals, love to have their photo taken. I get lots of great opportunities like this to take photos.

This is the moment when a local neighbour who I have hardly ever spoken to, invited me in for a cup of T - I ended up watching the cricket with his brother, in this their bakery!

Without my laptop I am restricted to editing photos in camera so it will be interesting to see what quality of output I can maintain.

Electrocuted Mac

2007-10-10T04:36:00.000-07:00

Had a wee suprise today when I discovered that my mac which was fryed by the electrics in the house that I am staying, (even with a UPS) is potentially going to cost in excess of 550 quid to repair, that is, if it needs a new logic board. Gutted. I am praying that it is the cheaper alternative - inboard dc circuit something or rather.

Oh well so I am back in internet cafe's and unable to make use of the broadband connection in the flat. The upside of it is I can't be distracted by the internet, or VCD's and I am able to focus on learning the local lingo and reading other books. I am reading a heart-breaking account based on try stories of people who live in this city. It is resulting in me seeing those on the street with new eyes.

Last night walking home, I bumped into some of the kids that I was working with last year. I ended up giving them some bread, I could see from the way that they recieved it they were hungry. Sometimes I detatch myself from the suffering that I see - But it is hard to ignore when it is people you know. This incident combined with the book is leading me to be more aware of the genuine desperation that is ever present in the eyes that I look into.

'Enhanced Interrogation' ..

2007-10-07T11:37:00.001-07:00

I have been reading on news aggregators about American policy on intelligence gathering. I suppose fundamentally I question whether it is possible to overcome evil with evil. (Emotive language I know but read on.) The Times story (link on right) draws comparisons between the policy of the Gestapo in Norway and The US policy on 'enhanced interrogation.' When will the American administration realise that they are not a law unto themselves. Ethically 9/11 does not give them a mandate to do whatever they want. Those in power, seem to me to be turning into those that they want to overcome. I understand that the prisoners at Guantanamo give them a problem, they don't want to let them loose, but what is the cost of keeping them there?

My thinking in this area is not well developed, I just know that it makes me mad when any injustice is carried out in God's name. A wise friend of mine said its not necessarily what is organizable into right and wrong, but where do we go from here.

Where do we go from here?

Bomb Iran.....

God forbid.

In a corner of the station.

2007-10-05T12:58:00.001-07:00

Having posted these two photos (see below) I realise that I want to comment on the location where they were taken. They are mostly taken in one small corner of the station. For the rest click View Slideshow on the right. I think most people (at least most westerners) would be shocked by the sight of the environment that these children and some of their parents are living in. Sitting in the dirt, surrounded by rubbish and stray dogs, people selling chai, hundreds of coolies rushing about with loads on their heads often as big as their own weight, and thousands of passengers. Today I saw a three year old boy lying on the ground, in the middle of the station concourse, alone, on his back, stark naked, amusing himself with his t-shirt. Some people thought it was funny, most just walked by as if nothing was untoward. Today I intervened as a women was beating the living daylights out of her three year old daughter. At the point where she started kicking the child, I went to stop her. She proceeded to then drag the child to a pile of rubbish and set about the traumatised child with a stick. So I then grabbed the stick off her, and ending up facing up to her as the child made it's escape. Fortunately she didn't try and hit me.
Anyway back to the corner where most of these photos are taken. The child on the right in the top photo (see post below), has learning difficulties, and normally drags himself around on his naked backside, in the dirt. But whenever he sees me he gives me a big smile. He has recently taken to standing up and walking, but his feet are slightly deformed from lack of use.
Trust me, these things have to be seen to be believed.

2007-10-05T11:54:00.001-07:00

She thinks she's a princess
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

With his knapsack on his back..

2007-10-05T05:02:00.001-07:00

With his knapsack on his back..
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

This is the sight I was greeted with yesterday, a five year old, who I know, walking on his own with a knapsack, where was he going? I don't know.

Tragedy ... and technology.

2007-10-02T04:18:00.000-07:00

I have realised the content of this blog jumps around somewhat ranging from tragic personal stories to tech info. I suppose it reflects the things that I think about and those things that I find of interest and think are worth passing on. Any way this is my way of giving myself that freedom to talk about things other than purely 'ministry'. On that note I found a 'game' which is designed to teach you how to avoid having your bank details or other personal details 'phished' by bogus sites. If you don't know what I mean I suggest you have a look, and even if you do and haven't seen it, take a look. (Link top right.) I intend to bring you soon a summary of my time in Asia up until now - call it if you want the (dreaded) newsletter.

Heroin...

2007-10-01T11:36:00.001-07:00

b and h
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

I found out last week that approximately 70% of all the adults who live in the station are heroin addicts. The dangers of heroin addiction were rammed home to me today.

We had brought an eight year old boy who is in care - to visit his Mum and his Dad at the station because he was missing them. He along with us found out from his Gran that his Mum had died during the week from an heroin overdose.

This is the boy pictured with me in the photograph, (which was taken a few weeks ago), please pray for him and his family. His 4 year old brother is also in care.

Please pray for me that God would lead me as I think and pray about what to do when my time is up in January.

tiger

2007-09-28T02:42:00.001-07:00

tiger
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

kite

2007-09-27T11:33:00.001-07:00

kite
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Promises...blogging....photography.

2007-09-27T11:05:00.001-07:00

Being a Christian is sometimes really confusing. There is a sense of expectation of good things to come but also a nagging doubt in God's faithfulness - Will he really follow through with his promises? Particularly the ones that are specifically for me. (If you are reading this and what I am saying is off your radar - then ask in a comment and I will try my best to answer.)

Sometimes you are in a situation and you think ‘wow I had imagined myself doing this, almost as though it had been in a dream.’ But now you almost have to pinch yourself to remind yourself that it is really happening. I might say to myself Oh yes He is faithful after all: but then the next day I will carry on as if I don't believe in his faithfulness.

I was reading an interesting article in the Telegraph - not ‘The Telegraph’. It was discussing the nature of blogging- contrasting it with newspaper reporting/journalism. The writer wondered if blogging was narcissistic. Interestingly he also noted the discursive aspect of it.
He saw that they could be a conversation. I am not sure how good I am at conversing with any comments made: hopefully this is not just a monologue. It can be a bit threatening opening up your heart for people to read, but I guess that is part of the risk of many creative ventures.

I have taken over a thousand photos this month, so hopefully some of them will be half decent. For those interested in photography, I have been experimenting with boosting the contrast,
and sharpness. Coupled with either totally de-saturating (b&w) or making the colours very saturated. Some of the results look like they are out of a magazine so that is encouraging. (if you haven’t already seen – note the Flickr link on the right.)

Any way hopefully someone will read my ramblings - until the next time..

New arrivals .. and some departures.

2007-09-25T09:47:00.001-07:00

I was taking the short walk from the centre where the organisation I am with to the auto-rickshaw stop, when I noticed some new arrivals living on the pavement.

A previously occupied stretch of pavement had overnight become the home for about 6 familes. No men in sight, just mums and hordes of children. I recognised one of the kids from my time here last summer.

I hadn't realised how mobile people are. It is as if a whole village has suddenly appeared out of nowhere - with at least 10 kids under 10 - and set up shop right there on the pavement.

Homes consist of a plastic sheet about 2 foot off the ground, weighted with a few bricks and stretched out to form a bivouac shelter. Here I also saw a baby girl approximately 3 months old sleeping, with no one in abvious attendance, in a bit of hessian almost in the middle of the pavement.

Some of the newly born feral puppies in the station did not make it through the flooding last night. I gathered a crowd when pursuading a bitch to give up her dead puppy which she kept dragging onto of the living eight, to try to revive it. I figured she might cause harm to them. She eventually gave up her efforts and went back to suckling her litter.

Youtube

2007-09-24T12:48:00.001-07:00

Found a couple of things on Youtube the other day - which I could only watch with a bit of a stutter due to the connection, however I highly recommend them both.

The first is an amazing bit of photography of a 'monster' as it races up a mountain. Ari Vatanen in his record breaking Pikes Peak accent. Even if you don't like motor-sport but are interested in photography/cinematography is a must.

The second which you are more likely to have heard of because I remember it from the Scottish press, is a slightly cheesy, but nevertheless outstanding short film done with time-lapse photography of edinburgh, watch out for the guest appearance of Orion. The links are top-right. Enjoy

Taxi or Ferry?

2007-09-24T10:26:00.001-07:00

Kfc stayed open during the flooding today, only hitch was you needed a boat to get there!

umbrella ...ella ...ella

2007-09-23T07:04:00.001-07:00

umbrella ...ella ...ella
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Widespread flooding today. To cross the road i took off my shoes and paddled across the street!

buy?

2007-09-22T04:42:00.001-07:00

buy?
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

I have just uploaded a new batch of photos to my flickr account please click on the link top right to see more. H

Technology..

2007-09-20T11:02:00.001-07:00

for the first time ever I found something I had written on the internet using google. Not surprisingly it was this blog but never the less it was a moment I enjoyed. However as the lecturers at college used to tell us, the fact that something is on the internet stands for very little. ( Maybe my next goal should be to get a book published!)

I have also added google analytics to this site which tells me all sorts of information about you the visitor ... your country.. service provider..etc. etc. even down to your monitor resolution. Freaky. Makes me wonder how many graphs I'm on!

According to my desktop widget, this city is presently a grand total of 3c warmer than sunny Glasgow.

I don't understand

2007-09-19T10:58:00.001-07:00

I don't understand
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Kite Alliance

2007-09-19T08:08:00.001-07:00

Kite Alliance
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

Managed to get this photo today (along with another 200+) - I am rather pleased with it, especially considering the choice of letter. I will be uploading more photos to flickr from time to time, please follow the link top right.

Question..

2007-09-17T16:41:00.001-07:00

I asked a friend this evening while chatting by text on skype.."how do you deal with seeing a 10 year old (or maybe 11) stupified out of his head on heroin...caked in dirt...skin infection on feet...clothes in tatters?" he had some ideas but wasn't really sure.

I concluded that it made me want to shout and swear and shake some people.

To do something...

striped eye jumper

2007-09-17T11:23:00.001-07:00

striped eye jumper
Originally uploaded by tigertigerbb

tiger back in the blogsphere.

2007-09-17T01:38:00.001-07:00

Back from a relaxing weekend at the beach. More relaxing than planned as I spent most of the time in bed with a 'violent conjunctivitis'

In the meantime while confined to my room with this contagious condition I have been sucked into the swirling vortex of facebook, which if you havn't discovered yet, is the place to be!

For the uninitiated: it is a very quick and easy way of getting in touch with folks esp. when you don't have an email. All you need is a couple of friends who are good at staying in touch with people and hey presto there are all your long lost friends.

Well hopefully by the end of this week people will have stopped looking at me as if i am some extra in a horror movie - with my psycho bloodshot eyes. And I will be allowed back into the company of the living. Oh and by the way - it is 30 degrees hotter here than Glasgow!

A wee rest

2007-09-11T21:10:00.001-07:00

for you folks that read tiger - he is having a wee rest from the interweb but will be continue sharing his thoughts (and your comments) from the start of next week.

and yet more about powerlessness...

2007-09-09T03:58:00.001-07:00

It is an interesting exercise - writing in a blog - I recommend it if you haven't tried it - I just pray that what I write is not boring.

When I write about powerlessness I am describing a process, a walk through a place of lack, a wrestling with the challenges of the new. To a new revelation of the depths of God and his power. This revelation may involve a complete inversion of my previous concepts of power. The old power says if you do this then... if you walk this way then... etc,etc .... No.

This inverted power, In fact the only good way use power I believe, Is as Christ, who did not consider equality with God as something to be grasped but was obedient, even to the point of death. There is power in dieing to self and living in Christ.

Christ in me, is powerfull. But powerfull to do what? - what kind of power.

Preaching over

That was a long way of saying - pray for me by all means, but don't try to hurry me along.

Life is a...

2007-09-08T09:55:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I think - Yeah now I have got everything worked out: I see how to do that, I know how that fits, If I do this then, etc etc.

But I have these moments of powerlessness, God shows me His grace. It is a no. No, not when you do this, no, not when you can work it out. I Am doing it.

I realise there is a whole lot of mystery there. Something that he is doing.

....a mystery.

New toy

2007-09-06T10:07:00.001-07:00

I have now got a data card for my mac, so i can now get on the interweb whenever I want however the connection can't cope with uploading photos so time will tell how much photoblogging I do (and if you see me on skype any conversation is likely to be garbled - sorry (skype id=mychristiannameamysurname))

I was out with my big camera this evening got some ace photos - but gathered a bit of a crowd - rather conspicuous - unfortuately I can't (spell) share them with u until i get to an internet cafe/wifi connection. Tiger!!

Writing - honesty a challenge.

2007-09-05T04:18:00.001-07:00

Can give you dilemna's writing a blog, you make yourself vulnerable by writing down your thoughts on the interweb for all and sundry to read. I suppose it is the same writing in general - it is a creative venture which like any creativity is open to criticism.

Oh well in the word's of Beautiful South 'I'll carry on regardless.' 'n'uf said

Top: Asleep on the street - an everyday sight Bottom: One of the boys from the station

2007-09-04T02:31:00.000-07:00

Are you a religious man?

2007-09-03T03:00:00.000-07:00

Everyone is...I believe in one God, he is in everything.

Do you think he is in animate objects and in-animate objects?

Yes.

Do you believe he is in this table?

Yes.

I believe in One God.
I believe every human being is made in His image ...although I am not sure what that means.
I believe that God became a man Jesus Christ
and He lived among us.
I believe God is Three in One, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

This is roughly the script of a conversation I had this evening with a guy who was sharing my table in a restaurant. (I let you decide which voice is mine.) I had a eureka moment when speaking. I have been struggling with the tension - how can God be so great and so loving and yet this world be such a total mess? Is he powerless to do anything about it?
Then I realized that he overcame the carnage by subjecting himself to that same mess. Amazing isn't it. In God's upside down kingdom, he overcomes the consequences of the abuse of power by becoming powerless.

Power seems to be a returning theme in my thoughts. Do I find God when I am in a place of powerlessness? What is God’s power like? It is almost like when I put those two words together they don’t belong together. But I can hear the critics saying ‘liberal hogwash, God is the omnipotent Creator who spoke the cosmos into being.’ He spoke creation into being, yes, and still upholds it by the Word of His power. And yes, He went ahead of Israel as a pillar of cloud and a pillar of fire.

But
my contextual westerner in Asia hermeneutic is that God is a God of power through powerlessness. Forgive the smug ‘Richard Baukhamesque’ theologizing but I mean it. Cyril of Alexandria pointed to the suffering of the impassable God, but in D.Cosden style (I don’t think I am misrepresenting him here) I am wondering whether even Cyril was right about the impassable bit.

Anyway I need to go and look up what impassible means.

2007-09-02T02:00:00.000-07:00

Hawker Dodging.

2007-09-01T04:56:00.000-07:00

Up to my usual Saturday antics - a long lie - too late to even say and then off into town - dodging hawkers and buying a ticket for what is becoming a habit. A Saturday retreat into western culture - an English language movie with no subtitles and some hibernation in a cafe with A/c. It can get a bit tiring, when what seems like everyone, makes a b-line for you because your a westerner. I have been experimenting with a blank look - to either be read as miscomprehension or even lack of sufficient mental faculties to hold a conversion. I am concious that this is probably neither a healthy nor ethical approach to engaging with humanity, particularly those of the hawker variety, but it has proved extremely effective today. Oh dear the things I do for a bit of peace and quiet.

Dead Body Collection Severe Gore Warning

2007-08-29T03:31:00.000-07:00

Well you know the sign that is part of the header for this blog: Since 1976 Dead Body Collection. I took the photo because I thought it was a bit comical, but today I witnessed the grisly truth. I saw two corpses, the first that I have ever seen. (Not counting the thousands of fake ones I have seen on t.v. and a few real ones in magazines and newspapers). But if that was not enough, one of them had had part of limb severed and the crows were fighting over their lunch. There is an Old Testament curse which features from time to time, ...the birds of the air will eat your flesh... . Well I tell you, it is quite something else when you see it for real! I think it will take quite a while to get over that. Starts you thinking about life, death, the after-life etc. I'll need to process it, no theology phd students to help me here though.

I not so sure about my fascism comment the other day, I still have severe doubts over the motivation for much of American policy, (and British for that matter) but I still feel uncomfortable with the term fascism in that context, mind you it may be that I am just too concerned that people might think I am turning into a Marxist!

On a lighter note: I got a comment on my blog in French today (on merits of college). It is signed Le Kip but the only person with a name similar enough doesn't know French well enough ... see for yourself.

Letter from Mum

2007-08-27T03:34:00.000-07:00

Got a letter from my Mum today which was nice. One of the things that she asked me was what were the children that I was working with addicted to? Well the answer is the same as what many street children around the world are taking. Take two individual cases. One lad 12+ has been using glue and smoking grass. Another kid under 7 has been using some of the smack that his folks are using. Brown sugar, smack, Heroin - what ever you want to call it, is common and cheap in this part of the world. Several times I have seen people who appear to be smoking brown sugar openly in the street. And if you didn't know, guess who was responsible for initiating and establishing the trade to this country in the first place, yes you got it, We were!!
Anyway enough of examining the skeletons in the closet. Oh but before I am finished getting political- let me go on another rant, I think this is what blogs are for-Eh!. I heard on Sunday about a certain act across the pond called the Patriot Act... can someone explain something to me unless I am stupid or something... is this not Fascism?

Merits of College

2007-08-24T09:24:00.000-07:00

I got an email from a friend asking me if felt that going bible college had prepared me for doing what I was doing, (the subtext I read as 'did I think I had wasted my time there?') I was thinking about it and thought I would post on it. Firstly I wouldn't have made the connection with the organization that I am volunteering with if I hadn't gone to college - now my second visit to Asia in 2 years.

I am probably in culture shock at the moment so I don't think I will be able to give clearly thought through answer (not to mention the fact that I wouldn't have heard of culture shock if I hadn't studied it!) Also to be fair to the college, I only did one module out of all the Youth min'/ Children's min' modules.
I don't think that studying anything can prepare you for the experience of being in such a different culture, (I know my friend J will agree.) As far as has writing all those essays helped me deal with answering Where is God in all this suffering and poverty? Why are people, made in the Image of God abased to begging, crippled and living naked on a street? For answering that question, I think probably no, going to college did not prepare me for this, but I was not really expecting answers to those sort of questions. [Joke: I never did the A101 essay on suffering.]

I am glad that I went to college - very glad to learn about exe(m)gesis, hermen(s)neutics, and subjective and objective genitives (The Love of God.... Love from God or Love for God...I think that is the right order) and other nuances of the text .

But I think it will really take a while before I really know what were the benefits. I can say Yes well I know Christ suffered for me and he suffered for all those who are suffering, and that is the answer, but how do I actually deal with the actuality of the suffering around me.

All the brockenness, selfishness and carnage that is humanity not to mention the rest of creation. I suppose I should maybe think a bit more 'cup half full'. Think of the joy of children born to loving families, the joy of simple things like spending time with family and friends and the beauty of creation.

But how does that help me deal with the injustice or inequality that I see? ...May your Kingdom come on Earth as it is in Heaven... I have been thinking of that song Where, Oh where's your prescence, O God (You Still God) A Godfrey Birtill and co classic. It ends 'I will be still and know that You are God.' God is still God even though there is all this carnage around me. I can't help feeling that He is trying to tell me something or show me something about Himself, to know Him, in a new way here, but I haven't quite got it yet - maybe I never will and maybe that is part of the point - living with the tension of not understanding. Or maybe I am making something complicated out of something simple. God is loving in the mess, and you love too.

I need to stop, getting dizzy again from chasing my tail. Incidentally it is quite a funny sight to see. I saw a dog doing it the other day.

By the way Roland met his UB40 tonight. (see last post)

A bit of Introspection

2007-08-20T21:30:00.000-07:00

When will I be satisfied with life with my life? (indulge me with a paragraph or two of moody questioning.) Peace and fulfillment and a sense of connection destiny are hard to find. In the last week I have found them in some unexpected places. Giving a one armed beggar a hug, sitting in a shack watching some railway urchins eat rice or sitting on the floor in a small hut in the middle of a slum, with a small group of people with no obvious reason to be happy, singing songs to the sound of a tambourine and a drum. Here I found a place I am not often aware of. Somewhere that I want to be but is often hard to find.

Is this place always here, but I am not aware of it, or is it somewhere that comes and goes? What is this place called? Each time I have been there this week it has seemed different each time. What do I do to get there? Or what do I not do to get there? I hear a voice... 'It has nothing to do with what you do..'

No. It has been something to do with what I have been doing.

I have found this place when I have loved.

To love - what is that? I don't really know, it is a mystery to me. What claim do I have on Love?

All I know is that since I became a Christian I have felt love for people that I hadn't before. I hear I question 'feel maybe but have you done love?'

Enough navel gazing for now. I feel like I am chasing my tail.

I did a bit of ratting this evening.
There's a rat in my kitchen, what I'm gonna do?
There's a rat in my kitchen, what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna fix that rat, that's what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna fix that rat.

There was one in the kitchen. The song came to mind as I went after it with a big stick. I was thinking-is this some primeval instinct to terminate vermin or is it actually a more sinister impulse. Anyway Roland had a close call and will live to see another day - he wasn't UB40'ied . Saw an absolutely mammoth one the other day, the size of a half decent rabbit and then some.

Comments again.

2007-08-20T21:22:00.000-07:00

I have unwittingly been blocking comments - but this is now rectified so it should work. If u have tried to comment and it has not worked it should now - so plse try again.

Comments

2007-08-16T08:50:00.001-07:00

Thanks for all the comments. Tiger Tiger doesn't know his name so any comments that try to tell him have not been added.. please keep the comments coming - thanks for the English language learning info h - anyone else with any materials resources etc plse let me know.

Independence day.

2007-08-16T08:39:00.000-07:00

Most of the day off sitting in a fancy (ex) colonial club watching the last golfers come into the 18th at dusk. There is chatter in the old rulers language. Within a mile of where I am is a huge slum. Which is surreal - or maybe I am just naive of the ways of the world. It is easy to talk about injustice when u r on the side of power- Was watching the different groups of young people at the independance celebrations - the boys from the home looked relatively poorly dressed but were fairly content to be there. Those kids from the station were edgy - ill at ease with the better dressed kids from the pavement clubs - used 2 being looked down upon in the world of the station. One of the teachers had pointed them out and said look those very poor children. The other group i help with - adult literacy - boys aged 12-20 were smartly dressed and confident even though they have never been to school and couldn't place their home city on a map of their country. It is going to be a long process to win the trust of the railway boys or to see change in their lives. Any way back to the present tandori chicken or prawns?

Arrival in Asia

2007-08-13T03:16:00.000-07:00

Well I am here

and boy is it hot

I thought that rather than bugging everyone with emails I would vent my angst in the safety of the interweb with the whole world able to read my delicate musings and artistic burblings at leisure. I am not sure if I will take to this new found pleasure with zeal but I do not doubt that I will have enough cynical comments to keep myself amused even if no one else is.

I have now done one days work at the station. The boys are a wild bunch ranging from 4 to 16+. I suppose u need to be tough to be able to fend for yourself in such an inhospitable environment. I can see the 'cycle of violence' in operation with a vengeance. There is a strong pecking order, the smallest are sometimes the most viscious. It is quite an intimidating task, the thought of helping out with this crew for the next few months. I am also helping with another group doing a bit a football and teaching some english at the same time. If any one has some soft copy english teaching materials they can send me (ie TEFL etc) or tips please get it touch.

Well now to post my first ever blog entry - history in the making.